Comments (1)

By Cabin Fevah, September 11, 2009 5:04 PM

History will prove time and time again, that all mankind and it’s utilities have evolved more and more liberally.

I feel an unfortunate instance has emerged as a failed liberation: Language.

I can’t help but get the most salty of notions when a youth, instead of fully expounding upon it’s thoughts, replaces their true emotion with ‘word’.

“I’m pretty hungry. How do you feel about getting a slice pizza?”
“Word.”

It is so uninspired that I often walk away. I feel more comfortable talking with my cat. When I ask if he would like some pizza, he coughs up a hairball. In this, I know the future holds no further optioning for combinations of dough, sauce, and cheese when inferring he and I should dine together.

A few weeks ago, I drove to Greeley to meet with a few friends and seek a night of restful sleep. While illegally downloaded media was being imparted onto a receptive medium for transportation and analyzation at a later time, we redeemed our available time at a local International House of Pancakes.

I put forth the notion that I may never swear inside a eatery again. The associate opposite myself replied, and loudly, that he would say ‘FUCK’ wherever he pleased. He declared that no words be taboo and no stone of lingual offense be left unturned — for his perceived lexicon and habitual gestalt required all that was available to him at all times.

I harangued his argument with all litmus tests of logical fallacy and cogence. There was indeed a load-bearing rod of self-fulfilling falcity.

I openly posited upon his feelings of the word ‘nigger’. Truly, not now-nor then, did I ever feel ashamed to say the word. I nary blinked once and sans a quiver in my delivery- I challenged his assertion that any public venue would be better suited with a complete freedom of phonetic dispatch.

Lo, at every suffer of the word ‘nigger’, he did detrude his pride. His frame was shrunk a third and his eyes did scrutinize the establishment.

I trust that children who encounter the wily-tongued in restaurants can grow up to be just as smart and produce completely sound arguments without reproducing the emotional irk and intonation that is ‘Fuck’.

Yes. Know this children: I will consider, seriously, your tills from judgment to fact without expletive. I do not deny the innocuous being of words, rather I deem the few already partitioned to be unnecessary.

No worries, we will do just fine without them.